60 Day Ironmind Challenge

I have been stuck in this awkward feeling for a few weeks, and I am not sure why….About three weeks ago, I had an epic meltdown about school (I feel like I have done pretty well. This is only the third one in 3.5 years), and I really felt like quitting. I am not a quitter. I have never quit anything in my life. If I set my mind to do something, I am going to do it. Sometimes I just need to say the words to snap myself out the bad feeling.  After the meltdown I took a two day break, and then got my life on track. I started listening to a podcast called “The Mindset & Motivation Podcast,” which is about changing the way you look at things. I struggle with the podcast at times because it talks about money a lot, and I don’t care about money. (I do, but I don’t care about being rich like the podcast discusses). The speaker, Rob Dial, stated he was starting a program called The 60-day Ironmind Challenge. I liked the idea—pick 7 goals to work on for 60 days to make your life better and change your mindset. However, I heard about the challenge after he began it, and I am a poor Doctoral student, I don’t have the money to invest in his program. So, I decided to do it on my own. I start my 60 Day Ironmind Challenge tomorrow, August 5, and it will go until October 3.

His plan—7 goals, 60 days; my plan—10 goals, 60 days. Nothing huge. Just little changes I need to make in my life. After some thought I came up with 10 goals to work on for 60 days to change my mindset, and hopefully, make my life better. Here’s the catch: this is probably the worst time period of my life to do a challenge like this.  I told Dad, there would never be a good time. If I keep pushing the challenge back, I will never do it. Truthfully, my mindset is more important than football season (gasp—you’ll see when you see one of the goals) or birthdays. Or even school problems. Changing how I view things is important to me. If you know me well, you know I am always striving to be a better person, and this will help me be a better person.  Yesterday was a rough day—a very rough day. I knew that I needed to do this challenge. Today, when I was listening to the church sermon, Pastor Tommy talked about two of the principles I planned on working on over the next 60 days. That was a message to me I am doing the right thing.

To be an accountable, I am informing others of what my 10 goals are, so if I struggle with them during the 60 days other people know. Also, I need people to know why I want to change my mindset. That is very important to me.

GOALS:

• Meditate daily—I have a very busy mind; it never turns off. I’ve heard overthinking is an addiction. When I heard it stated like that and considered it that way, I saw how overthinking could be an addiction. I want to quiet my mind, learn to channel my thoughts positively. Meditation will be a struggle for me because I have tried it before and always struggled to quiet my busy mind. I am going to try again. Really focus on it. Self-care is important, and I believe if I can learn how to meditate, I can help have less stress and more focus.
• Read scriptures 15 minutes daily—I read my scriptures daily, but I will admit I often lack focus when I am reading them. I need to do a better job to make sure I read my scriptures each and every day with the intent of learning from them. I want to do this first thing every morning to start my day off on a positive note. The Bible app I use has plans, and I am hoping to complete multiple plans during the 60 day period on subjects I feel I need to improve on—patience, hope, and grace. Grace is a big aspect of my life right now, and I really want to improve in that area.
• Say something kind to a stranger each day—I feel like it’s important to make a difference in people’s lives, and sometimes it is the little things that make the biggest difference. Telling someone I like their hair or their shirt will also push me out of my comfort zone. I am an introvert, and I like being that way. I don’t really like talking to people, especially if I don’t have to. If I am going to be a professor, I will encounter all kinds of people. I will have to talk to all kinds of people. Some, who I may not want to. Talking to strangers will help me learn how to communicate with others better—even in little ways.
• Limit caffeine—no coffee or energy drinks—My life was stressful this last quarter, and I didn’t sleep much. I got a lot accomplished, but I was always tired and dragging. So, I drank a lot of coffee and energy drinks. I had given up energy drinks a couple years ago. Even though I wasn’t drinking them every day, I was drinking them more than I should; they are terrible for you. I don’t like coffee or energy drinks, and I am not sure they give you energy. They are also terrible for you. So, just like Lent time, I am giving up coffee and energy drinks. Unlike Lent, I will not be giving up all caffeine. I will still drink soda and tea, but I will drink less. I have a coffee date with my friend in a few days, so she can drink coffee, and I will drink tea. This one will be difficult because I have created a habit, but I can break it. It takes 21 days to create a habit, so it will take 21 days to change it and create a new one.
• No alcohol—I am not a big drinker, never have been. I do not keep alcohol in my house, and I don’t (generally) drink when I go out—sometimes, when I celebrate. I think I have been using rum to help dull pain in recent weeks. I am a pretty happy person and confident in who I am, but in the past few weeks I have been dealing with hurt, pain, and self-doubt; feelings I am not used to. I have done things I am not proud of. I anger/sad stripped (to my bra) at my parents’ during a cornhole game (I pride myself that I don’t let my emotions get the best of me, and that night I did. Bad.). I also talked about how my boobs were perfect—okay, so maybe the self-doubt isn’t always there because I have always felt that about my body. I had only had ¾ of a Hannacolada (so called because they are a sugar-free version of a Pina Colada). I didn’t act like myself. I embarrassed myself and lost control of my faculties—things I don’t do. While I feel like it was more my emotions than the alcohol, I know the alcohol played a factor.  I hate feeling like I disappointed people, and in those moments I felt I had. Last weekend I played “Ring of Fire,” and I didn’t like how I felt afterwards. I knew that that had to be my last bit of alcohol for the 60 days (it will be about 70 since it’s already been 8 days). I like sitting next to my dad when we watch football and enjoy an adult beverage with him, but this won’t be happening for a while. I thought about having special days where I could drink, but decided that wasn’t for the best.
• Learn something new each day—infosponging—The founder of Clif Energy Bars does this. I found it really cool. He learns something new and random each day. He lets something that inspired him throughout the day teach him something. That’s my goal. It may be reading an article about exercise or googling Dobermans—whatever touches me that day. The point is to enrich and stretch your mind. I love learning, so this goal won’t be difficult to me. I can’t wait to share some of the fun and interesting things I have learned. If you have any suggestions, let me hear them…
• Dance and sing each day—be more carefree—I do this already. Not every day, though. And in the nude often…lol. I remember the FRIENDS episode when Rachel lets her inhibitions go and sings and dances naked when no one is home. I want to be more willing to let my inhibitions go. Of course, I will do this in my room, not the kitchen like she did, and I will make sure my blinds are shut. I love singing and dancing, but I feel self-conscious when I do those activities. I don’t want to be self-conscious, and I will never get better at each thing if I don’t do them. I am going to do them both each day, and I hope that will help me be more carefree, which is something I often struggle with. I like to be in control of what’s happening in my life, and I need to learn to let that Type-A in me go a little. I don’t want to be rigid and no fun.
• Walk Guido 15 minutes daily—I have to admit, I am the worst dog owner ever. My poor Guido gets neglected a lot. I come home from long days at work, and after feeding him, he and I sit in my room while I do hours of homework. His life is boring. My parents tell me I need to spend more time with him, and I always say he’ll be fine. It’s a coping mechanism. He is fine, but he is also 14. When he dies, I pretend like I won’t be sad, but I will actually be very sad: Guido and I have been through a lot together. You have a dog for 14 years, and they become part of your life. When I lived in the apartment, I had to walk him so he could go to the bathroom. I would take him to the dog park, too. After he eats in the morning and night, we roam the yard for a few minutes and go back inside. He deserves better. Guido has never been super affectionate, kind of like his mom, but I want to spend as much time with him while he’s still around. I don’t know how much time I have with him, and I want us to both enjoy it. If the weather is crappy, I will spend 15 minutes devoted to him in some way.
• Positive self-talk: 5 things—It’s easy to get down on ourselves when we are dealing with hurt and pain, and it’s easy to believe the things we tell ourselves when we are hurt. I have never had a confidence problem; I know who I am. That doesn’t mean negative self-talk doesn’t happen. I have struggled with negativity lately, so I am going to tell myself 5 things I see positively about myself each day. I am going to bolster my self-confidence back to where it’s always been. I hope this will help me have more gratitude for what I have, too. Gratitude is key in changing the mindset.
• Pray each morning and night in thankfulness—I have always prayed, but I have always struggled with prayer. Goes back to #1. I struggle to focus my mind. I also struggled with the formality of prayer. Pastor Tommy recently spoke on prayer, and I decided it to approach it more like a conversation with God. Be more open and honest. Sometimes, I let the fear of what I want get in the way. I tell myself: He already knows, which He does. There is power in saying the words, though. I need to do better on telling God what I desire.

SMALLER GOALS:

• Cold showers- help open the mind and stimulate the brain
• Mealtime prayers- I need to be more thankful for what I have
• Saying yes to more, no to less- be more willing to try things; push myself out of my comfort zone
• Gratitude-key to mindset change
• Apply to every job I am qualified for—why not?
• Journal- I need to document this journey, even though I am a writer, who doesn’t enjoy writing. Journaling is particularly difficult for me
• Joy/Hope/Vulnerability- first step is this

***IF ONE GOAL ON ANY DAY IS MISSED, THE WHOLE PROCESS STARTS OVER.

Let the challenge begin…I am ready. I am hoping to improve myself in many ways during the next 60 days. I hope I can help other people along the way, too. I will check in with you during the process. Thanks for keeping me accountable.